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Passion Pit Reviews
Author: Alan Pilon
Date: 2004

What does AIF stand for? Adult Interactive Fiction. If you likely to be offended by games with sexual content, you are advised not to open these files.

Reviewed by Kastier
Plot synopsis:
For one reason or another, youíve decided to go out on a blind date with a woman your friend Mark has set you up with, named, Lauren, Eileen, Amy, or who 
knows what, is a hottie. Unfortunately, youíre short on cash so you had to go to the drive-in theater for the date.  Since youíre out in a drive-in with a 
hottie, might as well try to get lucky. Wee!

Writing + Plot:
Passion Pit does have a plot and puzzles. Itís the same as most AIF games in that regard.  But unlike most, it tries to present the game as a more realistic 
depiction of life. That is, to get the girl, you have to make her comfortable and butter her up.  The concept is a good one, and that could be used to create 
an entertaining and perhaps, funny game that plays on all the drive-in movie clichťs.  

Instead, this game manages to be nothing more than a boring item hunt with puzzles that are near impossible to figure out without a walkthrough, with a 
virtually unresponsive parser, and an almost complete lack of anything that could be considered writing.  Heck, it didnít describe even a single object 
throughout the entire game.  Worse, getting to the "reward" in the sex scenes almost feels like winning a marathon race, only to have people throw poop on 
you at the finish line.

Iíll cover this more in the technical section.
Score: 1

Technical (design + programming):
Passion Pit was created with an early graphical based commercial text adventure kit GCS (I think).  It was extremely basic, and produced simple two word parser 
based games.  Two word parsers tend to be unforgiving.

What Alan Pilon managed to do here was take that basic two word parser format and make it even MORE unforgiving.  Doing simple commands that any NORMAL game 
would understand (like EXAMINE <object>) often ends up with you getting the following message...

"In this adventure, you must FEEL your way, so to speak..."

If I ever read that phrase in an IF game again, Iíll probably start throwing rocks.  What the heck does that phrase mean? What relevance does it have to the 
game?  It sounds like some sort of hint or something.  Is my character blind? With all the lack of item descriptions, he might as well be.  I canít look at 
the concession stand, I canít look at my car, I canít even look at the supposedly hot girl Iím with.  How the heck am I supposed to know what to do if 
I canít look at anything? 

Itís enough to make you tear your hair out.  

Passion Pit comes with a doc file from the author explaining how well received this game was when he put it on the BBSís back in 1988.  It was based on an 
older game named Drive-in. I wonder if Drive-in could have been any worse than this.  Somehow, I doubt it.

I guess I can understand the supposed praise only if we recognize that short of a few old Commodore 64 games, Passion Pit is the grandfather of them all.  It 
had almost no contenders.  The big question is, is an award legitimate if youíre the only one in the running for it?

The only real innovation in this game is that every separate time you play, the girl youíre with changes names and clothing. A neat trick, but totally 
inconsequential to the playing of the game.
Score:  1

Entertainment Factor:
What entertainment?  Moving around a parking lot full of cars with a move limit and a miserable parser, with no idea of what to do, or which of the verbs I 
guess will actually work this time, is not my idea of entertainment.  This game is frustrating, badly written, and not worth anyoneís time.
Score: 1

The Last Word:
Passion Pit blazed the trail for games to come, setting the standard for sucking for the next 16 years.  Ok, Iím being sarcastic... sorta.  In all honesty, Passion Pit isnít worth the anyoneís time... unless youíre a masochist, in which case, this will be right up your alley. 

This is a bad game, thatís poorly written, with an extremely unintuitive parser, and very little to reward you even if you do manage to slog through it 
far enough to get to the sex scene.  Donít bother.  No really. Donít. 

Kastier's ranking: 1 out of 10


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