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DELRON
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Horse Reviews
Author: A.Ninny
Date: 2007
TADS
What does AIF stand for? Adult Interactive Fiction.
If you likely to
be offended by games with sexual content, you are advised not
to open these
files.
Reviewed by David Whyld
This frustrated me from the word go. Considering it had
three testers and was written by one of the foremost members of the AIF
community, it seemed remarkably rough around the edges. First of all I had to
look into a closet to see what was in it, simply examining it not being enough.
There was an item in the closet which didn't seem to exist as far as the game
was concerned. I was advised I could pull stuff out of the closet, but the game
wouldn't let me. USE MOP didn't work, but CLEAN COURT did. Ahghghhghg!
Finally my co-worker, Ana, who I have the hots for, showed up. We played some
basketball. Or tried to. I kept throwing the ball and missing whatever I tried
throwing at. It was only later, when re-reading the README file, that I
discovered I needed to SHOOT BALL instead of THROW BALL to actually get anything
to work. Aahaahgaaa again! I then saw this in the room description
[TADS-1008: invalid datatypes for binary '+' operator]
which didn't really raise my opinion of the game much. Did this lot really get
past three separate testers? By this time, I was pretty much ready to throw in
the towel (or should that be SHOOT in the towel?) but decided to persevere a
while longer to see if I could win the game of Horse and get to score with my
sexy co-worker. Unfortunately I couldn't either win the game or score. I played
40+ rounds of the game and hadn't won. And the only thing I lost was my
willpower to play any longer.
I'll give the game a thumbs up for the writing which was certainly better than
average, but for the gameplay side of things? A definite thumbs down.
Arousal: non-existent.
Reviewed by Softiron
As a kid, my friends and I played this game frequently,
though we called it LOSER. Of course, had we been playing A. Ninny’s version, we
would have wanted to lose as quickly as possible.
What makes this game of strip’n’fuck HORSE work is the build-up. Reminiscent of
the rules for the eponymous game in the movie BASEketball, each person is
allowed to distract their opponent before taking a shot, either by talking or
teasing them in some manner. I was delighted to discover that many of my ideas
were implemented, including kissing her neck. Additionally, to have some of your
teases backfire on your character is brilliant.
My only real gripe is that the dialogue can get a little repetitive, as the
shots you take and the teases you make are all too finite.
Ultimately, it doesn’t matter whether you win or lose, as your oversexed blonde
co-worker will screw you either way. Which is how it should be, because when
you’re playing strip HORSE, there are no real losers.
In a tough race to the finish, HORSE galloped across my ballot line in 3rd
place.
Stroke Meter:
Reviewed by Grimm Sharlak
You play a member of a sporting centre’s cleaning staff, and find yourself alone
at the end of your shift with a sexy co-worker and a basketball ring…
This game also rates well, due to an inventive way of play. Rather than the
usual AIF fare, this is almost a CYOA game based around a game of “Horse” a game
where, in this case, you try and
match each other’s shots on the basketball court. This leads to a menu driven
game, although in between you can enter commands to try and distract your
opponent.
HORSE is certainly inventive, and well written overall. Another great effort
from A Ninny.
Rating: A
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